Page 12 of 366: 3rd Day Of School

@$^%*$^#$$#$!$---> These are the first thing that came out of my mind when I step out from the mrt, when I arrived at Kent Ridge. 

$%^%*^%*@%$!%@$%$!#^%#&%^*%^----> These are the first thing that came out of my mind when I step out of Kent Ridge Mrt. 

$%()&%($#^(%$*$_(&*_)(*##)_*%&#(&(%&&$(_#*(#---> These are the first thing that came out of my mind when I'm squeezing into my A Bus.

*$)*#%)&#$^(T(_%$^(_#&_(#@&_(@&(_$&#_(&_(&@#%_(&#$_^---> These are the first thing that came out of my mind when I reached FASS.

@$*@#)*)!&%&!&(&$#_%_@^%*_!$%_(!&(_&_(&_&#_!^@^$*!@&$~@&$#_(&---> These are the thing that came out of my mind when I'm in the lecture. 

As an old saying goes, 

When life gives you lemon, add vodka. 

Trust me, you don't want to lose your sanity.

I just summarized my 3 day in school! There's no words to describe this agony and prolonged melancholy feeling I have within me when I come to school. I know I'm acting like a 3 year old kid, who refuses to go to nursery. I understand that. Trust me, when you have a taste of how university life is like... you would never want to go back. The only thing I take off is the flexible timetable, which means I can go home at 2 to have my afternoon nap, just like when I was in secondary school. Worst take off: Competition, High Stress Level, Loneliness, Bell Curve. Bell curve is a second satan to me. Your energy is easily strained within like 2 days of school... All around you are really friends which you most probably won't see a few years later. Well, I guess that's life. Kids, do treasure your primary, secondary, jc friends. You never know when your friend will turn your back on you. It's not hard to find friends, but you need to step out of your comfort zone, to embrace the differences. After all, university is about independence. 

Fix You.

                 

When you try your best but you don't succeed 

When you get what you want but not what you need 

When you feel so tired but you can't sleep 

Stuck in reverse 

And the tears come streaming down your face 

When you lose something you can't replace 

When you love someone but it goes to waste 

Could it be worse? 

Lights will guide you home 

And ignite your bones 

And I will try to fix you 

And high up above or down below 

When you're too in love to let it go 

But if you never try you'll never know 

Just what you're worth 

Lights will guide you home 

And ignite your bones 

And I will try to fix you 

Tears stream down your face 

When you lose something you cannot replace 

Tears stream down your face 

And I 

Tears stream down your face 

I promise you I will learn from my mistakes 

Tears stream down your face 

And I 

Lights will guide you home 

And ignite your bones 

And I will try to fix you

Page 3 of 366

Are my days going to waste? Day 3 of 366, yet I'm still at home... doing nothing! 

God, I'm feeling so stressed about my CORS bidding! It feels like I'm being left alone all by myself, to face the new environment, lecture, and everything! :( I'm once again, afraid to step out of my comfort zone! I don't know why! I'm scared to face everything alone. I'm afraid to go into lectures, feeling lonely! #foreveralone Why am I reacting like this? I use to be that brave girl who went to TS lecture alone, but I lied! In fact, I hate the fact that I need to go lecture, feeling so insecure, with the fear that I might sit alone! That's why I skipped so many lectures! Well, we do have to face all these troubles alone. 

Where's the courageous girl I used to see?

Praying that the NUS cell would bring me a better lives, and of course to live in a community! Afterall, I love being in His Love, and His community! :)